It's hard, but you have to tell a whining child "no".
How to Stop Children From Whining
You're in the grocery store, just rounding aisle three, when your daughter sees a ray of light shining down upon the cereal of her dreams. She sees princesses on the outside of the box, and the promise of pink sugar on the inside. She must have this cereal. She makes this her life's focus for the next twenty minutes. With each repeated, "I said 'no!'" her bellows escalate into shrieks. Now you're starting to get the evil eye from fellow shoppers. Twenty minutes later, in exasperation, you whisper angrily, "Fine! But just this once!" Find out how to condense this scene down into one "no" in aisle three.
Instructions
Things you'll need:
- Patience!
- Be prepared for things to get ugly for awhile. If your child is used to getting what she wants by whining, she's not going to give up too easily. It may take several incidents before your child understands that she will not get a response to her whining. However, if you can stick with this process until it works, it will save you hours/days/years of miserable incidents.
- Respond to your child using the following outline:
- Acknowledge your child. Tell your child that you understand that she wants the item she's requesting.
- Give your child an answer (no, later, etc.).
- Explain the reason for your answer.
- Offer another suggestion.
- Be consistent. The tough part is that now you have to stick to it, no matter how much screaming, crying, and whining takes place. Consistency is the only way to make your efforts pay off in the long run. Again, it may take several separate incidents for this to work, but it will work.
Tips
- You can tell your child that it is okay that feels she's upset, but that you don't want to listen to her whining. Let her know that if she wants to cry/whine, she can go into another room and do it. Tell her that when she is finished whining, she can come back into the room.
- When your child gets to the point where she does not continue to whine after you give her your answer, be sure to praise her, and tell her how proud you are that she is being such a great listener.
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